From Mommy to Mamiiiii: My Live Transformation

Okay. Y’all ready for me to be vulnerable? TL: DR - I am going to get back to my pre baby HEALTHY body (read it if you want some real mom ish and relatable content)

I am not confident in my body. I am a confident person, yes. However when it comes to body image postpartum…ya girl is struggling! So I think it’s time to lay it all out there and bring y’all with me along on this journey. Why? Accountability.

I used to have a BODY.. okay? I’m talking about the oblique abs cut back in the day and STILL I wasn’t where I wanted to be. Sounds absolutely insane when I think about it now. Let me give y’all an image so you can be like “girl what?” right along with me.

GIRL WHAT!?

I still thought I needed to be more cut, more toned. MORE.

I’m here to tell you that 1 - I was insane to think I needed to be more toned than this, 2 - I was just existing. I was single, living in Cali working part time, living my best life. I was not training for anything, not competing, the mentality of me thinking I needed to be more toned was (AND STILL IS) society and the environment where image really seemed to matter. I will say that some posts that I have seen speak about being unhealthy or pushing your body to it’s limits, however that is not my story. I was healthy. I had a coach who gave me a great strength training program to try (shoutout to you CONNOR at Spark Fitness in NoHo)! I was enjoying it and I was getting STRONG. I was in the gym for 2 hours a day and only 3 days a week. I was allowing my body to rest adequately! I was eating well, getting enough protein - this was a great weight!

Fast forward I moved out of Cali, then a few years later I met my husband (got married) and got pregnant! I remember telling myself that I would be that CrossFit mom who is pregnant and working out like no other. I was wrong. That was the biggest lie I have ever told myself. The second I found out that I was pregnant, I STOPPED ALL working out. Everything. I didn’t even bother to eat well. I was vegan at the time - I started eating fish and cheese. I was nauseous, had a bad taste in my mouth that I couldn’t get rid of, I was working full time and I was just over it. First trimester was rough to say the least.

Not only was is physically draining, it was difficult for me mentally to wrap my mind around living in a society where I’ve always been striving to lose weight - then met with needed to gain weight for my baby. Gain weight, but not too much weight… I was the one that gained too much weight right away.

I ate whatever, whenever. My go to? Strawberry shakes, blizzards, LOVE IT size at Cold Stone with cookie dough (y’all might say ew but I eat that pregnant or not… just a LOT more frequently when I was pregnant). I gained 70-80lbs. I went from 150-160lbs (pictured) to 220 in what felt like a really short timeframe! From going to CrossFit at 5am every single day - or lifting super heavy weights 3 times a week to NOTHING my body said “oh… changing gears are we? Bet!”

This was me at 6 months pregnant

So many strangers would come up to me and with all good intentions, say - “oh you’re due soon aren’t you?” or “Oh girl you’re about to pop!” wrong. 2 months to go!

After a traumatic labor and a terrible doctor - I was just in survival mode for months like so many of us are (unfortunately). I am so grateful and LUCKY that my husband was able to be home for most of my maternity leave, and I am so grateful to my mom for taking off work, traveling to come spend time with us. She was feeding her baby while I was feeding my new baby. She fed me protein smoothies, snacks, cooked healthy food for us - she did anything and everything we needed her to do. LOVE YOU MOM!

Fast forward, I am cleared to get back to the gym and I am PUMPED to get back to Crossfit. What I did not expect was to not be able to do most of the things that I have done before - jumping included! Talk about a mental puzzle - knowing that I was just doing all of these moves, but physically I couldn’t even jump!

Let me show you why.

1 week postpartum, 220 lbs, nursing, trying to survive. and sleep.

I would like to send a special message to all the birthing humans of the world. Our bodies are incredible. period.

I had gained so much weight, my joints didn’t work to support the extra weight! My arms could no longer support the pull ups I used to do. The legs had to do more work to squat my bodyweight, and after being pregnant and having super painful sciatica, squatting even felt weird.

I have now been INCONSISTENTLY consistently going to the gym for 2 years. What I mean by that is that trying to balance work, my husband and my schedules, our little one, life has been lifein’ BUT I have to remind myself that working out is good for me not only physically but also mentally. I workout for me, but I also workout for my family and longevity of life.

So with all of that said if you have made it this far, THANK YOU. I am bringing y’all with my on this journey if you’d like to stick around for the ride! Here’s to holding myself accountable. Here’s to telling ourselves it’s okay - these things take TIME. Be who you are, and focus on the journey, not the image. Consistency is key. If you lack motivation, find a buddy. Find someone to hold you accountable. Actually hold you accountable. If I can be that person for you, I will do my best and post my workouts. Post my progress. I have made TONS in two years.. inconsistently. Now I am ready to GO. Join me! with love - aisha.

Me, just now…HEALTHY. MAMA.

Who knows how much I weigh… last time I weighed myself I was 198.